Joy and Jasmine

by Vlad

August 2007

I’d like to tell you about our experience in welcoming Jasmine into our family on July 18, 2007. As before with our first, we decided not to find out the gender. It is what it is. We’ll be happy either way. We had no ultrasound done. Our plan was to stay in the privacy and comfort of our home, and asked Mary to once again be present and lend her expertise. Mary is like family to us. She is the only person my Joy and I want to be with us at such a time as this.

The day before Boaz was born; my Joy was sledding along with a bunch of us in front of our house. This time, the first sign of labor came while on the drive home from the drive-in theater. We went to bed anticipating having a baby real soon as contractions were coming on stronger and more frequent with time. To my surprise, and Joy’s slight disappointment, by morning the contractions had let up and were nearly none existent.

By bedtime, the contractions had picked up again. This time, Joy knew this was it. Debbie called offering to pick up Mary whenever we needed her (Mary is of Amish background with no phone, vehicle, etc.). The contractions kept Joy from getting a goodnight’s rest (though I managed). At 5 AM, she woke me up and told me it was time. I got up, called Debbie, and set up the living room for delivery. Mary came just before 6 AM. Joy was on the couch in the living room.

Something new for this birth was a birthing stool. Teresa raved about using the one her mother made for her, so we asked if we could borrow it. I didn’t know just how it was to be used, but when the time came, Joy had it all figured out. She didn’t get on it until the pushing stage started about 7:30 AM. Until then, Joy was sitting on the couch as cool as a cucumber. I tell you what, my Joy is amazing at handling her contractions with perfect calmness. She doesn’t brace herself and get all tense. Instead, she just goes limp, totally relaxed and lifeless. Of course, being married to me, she gets lots of opportunities to practice her relaxing techniques.

Around 7:30 AM, my Joy felt her body telling her it was time to push, and all the relaxing went out the door. You know the song - You Make Me Want to Shout? Well, she was all about it. She sat on the birthing stool and screamed her head off. I was in front of her on one knee while she hugged me and squirmed around. During that process, she managed to find the elastic on my boxers and pulled up with a purpose. Normally, a wedgie is not something I would put up with, even from Joy. Under the circumstances, however, I decided to bear it. No permanent damage was done.

Shortly after Joy started pushing, we could see the baby’s head. In fact, she pushed for a total of about 25 minutes, and our little Jasmine was in my hands (7:55 AM). Lots of dark hair and light colored eyes (for now). I recall Boaz didn’t cry at all when he was born but Jasmine was crying before her feet were out of the birthing channel. She is entirely adorable, as one would expect from her mother.

While I was unwrapping the cord from around her arm and torso, Joy was catching her breath, and asked, “Well, what is it?” I replied, “I don’t know.” It didn’t dawn on me to look, so I did. There was some thing missing (which was actually puzzling) so I said, “It’s a girl.” Joy responded with a big smile. We immediately helped her off the stool and unto the floor. I handed Jasmine to her who was breastfeeding in no time. I cut the cord, and felt a great deal of relief all at once.

That nice feeling of relief drifted away pretty quickly when I noticed the flow of blood coming out of my Joy. One look at Mary’s face told me she thought it was unusual too. We both hurriedly put out more towels trying to contain it all. It was going all over the place. I was thinking it was going to stop any minute now, but it didn’t. Mary said we needed to get the placenta out quickly. She pulled out the umbilical cord until we saw, on Joy’s belly, the placenta reached the birthing channel. Joy pushed, and the placenta was out pretty quickly. We put it in a bowl to examine it later, and make sure it was all there.

For the next few hours, Joy continued to bleed soaking towel after towel. She was lying on the floor the entire time nursing Jasmine, and said she was fine. Mary made a comment about her losing too much blood, and that I needed to do something to stop the bleeding. I gave Joy some cinnamon powder in water to drink. I also got a handful of cinnamon sticks for her to chew on. Then, I gave her some cayenne stirred into some grape juice to drink. She followed that down with some peaches as she had not eaten any breakfast yet. The bleeding started to subside after the she took the cayenne.

A little later, we attempted to get Joy into the herbal bath I prepared for her in the bath tub. The bleeding had not completely stopped, but it was getting there. Joy was lying on a big sheet of plastic surrounded by bloody towels. We moved her off the plastic and unto a blanket. I then dragged her into the bathroom by pulling on the blanket (that way she didn’t have to put any effort into getting there). When we got in there, she said she needed to go on the toilet, so we helped her up. Not a good idea. Once on the toilet, her face went pale, and she fainted. She came to real quickly only to go into shock (eyes rolled back and was shaking while unconscious).

The immediate thought in my mind was, “This is not happening.” As I prayed, I was doing all I could to hold her up on the toilet. Mary helped me get her back on the blanket, and I dragged her back to the living room floor. She was fully conscious by the time we got there but weak. I handed Jasmine back to her to continue nursing. Then, we used pillows and comforters to make her comfortable. A second dose of cayenne in grape juice, and the bleeding completely stopped. A bigger dose earlier would have probably done the trick, but the stuff is hot enough in small amounts. On an empty stomach, it’s even worse.

With Joy now comfortable, and Jasmine peacefully nursing or sleeping, I served up some food for the 3 of us. Joy especially needed some nourishment. Afterwards, we all fell asleep for a little while (Boy, that was nice). After waking up, we weighed and measured Jasmine: 6 lbs. 12 oz., and 20 in. long. (4 oz. and an inch more than Boaz). We then, moved Joy to the guest bedroom and laid her on the bed. She started to lose consciousness while getting her on the bed but held in there. She slept and rested some more while Mary and I cleaned up the mess that had been made.

By 6 PM, Joy was looking and feeling better after finally taking her herb bath. Jasmine continued to nurse, and both of them had gotten in some more naps. With the house back in order, Mary, Boaz and I went down to the pond to feed the fish. Debbie drove up to pick up Mary. Then, Lori and Katie stopped by with dinner, which we enjoyed very much.

Boaz was not troubled at all by the day’s events. First, he slept longer than usual and didn’t wake up until 10 AM (which worked out great). He is “ready to go” when he gets up. After observing Joy with Jasmine for a little bit, he went outside to play as usual. Shalom called and offered to pick him up and keep him for a little while. When she brought him back, she said he had eaten all the food I gave her to feed him, and gave her no trouble. He loves spending time with Gracie (Shalom’s 2 ½ yr. old daughter), and Shalom is one of the few people we would trust him to. That was the only time Boaz has been away from Joy and I.

Lots of folks have asked how Boaz is responding to Jasmine. Having her in our midst has had an interesting effect on him. He is now quite affectionate. He is eager to hold her, and often lays his head besides hers when she is lying somewhere. He has also started nursing during the day, on occasion. Joy has never stopped nursing him at night (not to sleep), but he has not been nursing during the day for some time. As with the last pregnancy, Joy is producing milk with a purpose. There is enough for all of us plus a friend from the community that feeds it to her baby.

Joy rested a lot during the first couple weeks and is recovering quite well. She has gained much of her strength and energy back. So much so, that I have to step in and keep her from doing too much. For the first couple weeks, I’ve had many things to do that she normally takes care of (from bathing Boaz to laundry). All that, and she also gets lots done with our business. I am amazed at how much she gets done in a day. I do a little here and there, and expect it to be noticed. She is great at everything she does…keeps the house clean and very organized, cooks better than anyone I know (mom is close), very thrifty (I’m the spender), can out swim me any day (has many times), pretty good at ping pong (I have to be better at something), quite sexy, and my best friend. Solomon never had it this good.

Thanks to all of you that have ministered to us: Teresa, Shalom, Debbie, Lori, Katie, Rachel, Stephanie, Barbara, and Sarah. Your meals, gifts, time, etc. have helped my Joy in getting lots of rest, and know that she is important to you. We are especially grateful to the Lord for Mary. She spent an entire day with us helping doing anything needed, and expecting nothing in return. Mom flew in for a few weeks after the birth to help here and there, and indeed she was helpful. Most of all, we thank you, Jesus, for giving us Jasmine to train and enjoy.

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